Dating Disasters

Bad Examples From Hollywood Chick Flicks

Sometimes, romantic comedies make dating look too simple. How often, after all, does your crush really stand below your window, holding a boom box above their head in a sweet, slightly pathetic attempt to woo you? (Plus, today he would probably just hold up his mac laptop and have Genius choose a song on itunes, which doesn't really have the same effect.) Instead of looking for perfect dating examples in chick flicks, sometimes it helps to look back on the cheesy romantic movies for dating advice on what not to do.

He's Just Not That Into You


Although Ginnifer Goodwin plays the adorably desperate Gigi Philips in this recent chick flick, her endless phone calls and oblivious pestering almost make you look away while she naively navigates through painfully awkward moments throughout the movie.

Clueless



Although this movie will always reign as the queen of 90's chick flicks, Clueless' happy ending comes only after a series of dating disasters. Though Cher ends up with Josh (her sort of half-brother, which always seemed a little creepy, but goes unmentioned throughout the movie), she first attempts to entice Christian. Try not to follow Cher's slightly faulty radar when it comes to choosing men, and avoid her first dating disaster when she invites Christian over to watch a movie, falls off her bed and fills the house with burning smoke.

My Best Friend's Wedding



Julia Roberts has managed to play nearly every likeable character, from the sweet younger sister in America's Sweetheart to the hard-working, ingenious single mother in Erin Brockovich. Yet Roberts shows a new, less angelic angle in My Best Friend's Wedding, when she tries (and fails) to entice her soon-to-be-married best friend away from his fiance (played by Cameron Diaz). Roberts continuously attempts to embarrass the fiance in ways that merely seem to make Diaz appear more adorable. Though Roberts still comes out likeable, her man-stealing attempts only backfire in her face.

Old Dating Rules You Can Break

Some rules are meant to be broken!

The rules of dating are meant to last through the ages, right? Wrong! The dating rules of years past don't always work in our modern-day relationships, and quite frankly, some rules are meant to be broken. Here are some common old-school dating rules that you can update to fit into your own modern-day love story.

Old Rule: You have to fix every problem immediately.


New Rule: You can allow some small conflicts to go unresolved.

We've all been told you should never go to bed angry, but sometimes it's better to just sleep on the problem. This isn't to say that you shouldn't let your man know how you feel, but you should accept the fact that you won't always be in perfect agreement on every matter.

Sometimes disagreements occur that can't be resolved instantly (or even resolved after some work). If it's something small like he doesn't hang up his coat when he gets to your place and instead throws it on the back of a chair, mention it once in a joking way, but let it go.
Most likely, it's a habit that won't end, and there's no point in fighting over it.
But if it's something big like his total disrespect of your family, take it up with him and hash out the situation.

Old Rule: You can't check out anyone else.


New Rule: It's OK to observe the scenery.
There's nothing wrong with noticing a hot guy when you're out, and just because you notice someone else doesn't mean you aren't into your man anymore. But that's not to say that you should stare at every guy that you see throughout the day.

If you notice your man checking out another girl, don't freak out. You could even comment on the girl by saying she's cute, which makes you sound more confident about your own appearance and adds to you own appeal.

Old Rule: You have to give him a complete run down of your day.


New Rule: Give him the highlights and let him ask more questions.
Sometimes it's better to give your man the Cliff Notes version of your day instead of talking about every single thing that happened. Mention the big stuff, but let him dig for the smaller details if he's interested (and trust us, he will be). If you torture him by telling every single detail of Jane's new haircut and Bobby's new suit, he's going to get bored easily.

Try to give your man a quick summary or even just phrases like "I saw your friend Mark today", but don't give him anything more. He'll be intrigued since you aren't letting him in on every single detail, and he's bound to ask about what else happened during your day. Plus, since he's asking the questions, he'll be much more interested in what you have to say.

Dating Through The Decades

It may be hard to imagine, but the concept of dating has not been around for very long. This article will go through the history of dating in Western society starting from its recent beginning to what dating is like today. Hopefully you'll understand a little better what it was like to be a teenager for your parents and grandparents.




Before the 20th century dating did not exist. You might have heard about people "courting" in historical movies or books. The difference between courting and dating is that courting is specifically to get someone to marry you, while dating is to get to know a person better.

Year 1920-1945

It was around this time that adolescence (teenage-years) started to become recognized as a stage in human life with its own culture. Dating became part of that culture. It's from this period that we get the term "going out" because it meant precisely that -- leaving home and going out. Going out usually meant going dancing or going to the movies, and this required money. Often it was the guys who could afford nicer things who would succeed over those who could not.

The Great Depression and World War II put a damper on dating, basically putting it on hold until the end of the war.

Year 1945-1960



After the war, dating and marriage started to happen earlier. Dating would begin in junior high, and most people would get married between the age of 20 and 22.

In junior high, teens would meet in groups and partner off. Once you found someone you really liked you would start to "go steady". Going steady meant calling each other regularly, going on dates every week and exchanging love tokens, such as class rings or school pins.

 

 
Year 1960-2000


The role of women saw a huge change in the 1960's. The feminist movement gave women the sense of empowerment that they could be much more than just a wife. The invention of oral contraceptives (the Pill) and more widely available contraceptives led to more liberal views of pre-marital sex and made sex a more important part of relationships.

In the late 60s the first dating shows popped up on TV, helping singles find someone outside their usual social circle.

Year 2000-Present

Today we live in a global technological age. Dating is still very present in our lives, but it has changed thanks to modern technology. The world of online dating expanded our search for "the One" to the entire world. Now many relationships begin online without a face-to-face encounter, and nothing is ever official until it is proclaimed to the world on Facebook.

Technology has also made it much easier for people to maintain long-distance relationship. Expensive phone bills are not necessary when you can chat with your partner online or even talk to them with a VOIP service like Skype. You can even see them with a webcam! If you live in different time zones, you can always send an e-mail instead of waking your loved one up in the middle of the night with a phone call.

Another new trend is speed dating. Speed dating is a quick way to find someone. These are organized nights where you have several short mini-dates, and once you've talked to everyone, you choose who you would like to get to know better.

We have all these conveniences available to us today, and yet dating doesn't get any easier. Regardless of what decade you go through your teenage years, heartache and heartbreak remain the same.

How To End Your Summer Fling

With summer winding down, it's time to start thinking about how to properly end your summer fling. While you both went into the situation knowing that the relationship would only last through the summer, it still isn't easy to end a relationship with someone you have grown to care about. Keep reading to find out our tips on how to successfully end your summer fling with as little drama as possible.


Pick an appropriate time.


Just because it's a summer fling doesn't mean you can be casual about ending your relationship. Ending your relationship at an appropriate time can make the experience a lot better for everyone involved. Don't wait until your significant other's (SO) cat has died or you see your SO out in public with tons of friends to break up. Instead, pick a time that's sensitive to your SO's schedule such a day when you know that he or she doesn't have much happening.

Find a neutral meeting place.

Before you decide where you break up, think about how your future ex will respond. If you think your SO will make a scene, you might want to pick a public place so both of you have to keep your emotions in check. If you think your SO will handle the situation well, then pick a more private setting so you can talk about the situation. Regardless of where you decide to meet, pick a place that's a neutral meeting ground. Don't go somewhere that's always been your SO's favorite hangout or a place that you've been going to for years. By picking a neutral spot, you avoid a home-field-advantage situation which makes the situation easier for both of you.

Do it in person.

There's no reason to not break up with your SO in person. If you break up via email, text or phone, you end up looking like you never cared about the person to begin with (and really, who wants to make someone feel that way?). Instead, set up a time to meet up with your SO in person so you can talk about the situation. While it may hurt to face the other person, you can commend yourself on not taking the easy way up. Every breakup deserves just as much respect as the relationship, so take the time to talk to your future ex face-to-face.


Stick to the facts.
 Breaking up is never easy, so don't make the situation more difficult by bringing up things that aren't important. Even if you still have suspicions that your SO cheated while he or she was away at summer camp, now isn't the time to talk about it. Let your SO know that while you had fun in the relationship, it's time to make the best decision for both of you by moving on. By avoiding the small arguments over things that did or didn't happen, you end up looking like a better person in the situation and you help make the breakup go more smoothly.




We never said that breaking up would be easy, but if you use our suggestions you can get through your breakup successfully.

Real World

Real world.

I appear to be meeting you prematurely. Already you've crushed me in your ruthless grip, squeezing me until I'm gasping for air that just won't come.

You have given me hope but then you tore it away.

The only thing I have is slipping from my numb fingers.

I might as well be dead; I will be soon enough anyway.

Stop please.

It's getting really difficult to breathe. And this uncontrollable shaking is quite uncomfortable. Then there's this feeling in my stomach -- the twisting and pulling, like I'm about to lose everything I've eaten. I've cried so much I think I've run out of tears.

You really aren't very friendly; I see why everyone complains about you.

No matter how much I beg and plead, you refuse to let go.

You refuse to let me breathe and to let me keep the contents of my stomach. You refuse to look upon me with a pitiful eye, to look upon the little girl lost and scared, clutching onto familiarity, clutching onto the safe feeling of love and happiness. You're trying to take it away, but the little girl can't let go. I can't let go.Once that familiarity is gone, that rope tied to my waist breaks; I'll fall.

I may not look like I'm falling, but I will; internally, at least.

Behind the potentially hopeful smiles, that little girl will be lost inside of herself. She'll be slipping further and further into the darkness until she finds the bottom. And when she hits, she'll break just like that rope.Bones will snap like the hope that you tore away. Blood will spill like the tears she tried so hard to fight.

The sad record spinning in her head will shatter like the dreams she cherished so dearly. And when you finally let her go to try to save her sorry soul, it will be too late. You'll try to let her breathe easily, to stop squeezing her chest.

You'll take the knife out of her heart, and you'll see she's already gone. I hate you, real world.